It’s been 3,013 days that my captors have held me here. Eight long years. Eight long years of 23 1/2 hours in this house with a 30 minute break for “outdoor activities”. Eight long years of sharing this house with cellmates that drive me insane.
One of my cellmates is this big, goofy fat guy named Sammy. He claims he’s from a long-line of aristocratic felines from England, but I snicker at this. He’s so happy all the time it makes me want to barf. Sometimes I find myself just staring at him with a look of complete disbelief and disgust on my face. How can this guy be for real? He’s locked up in this PRISON, and he likes it? And he’s been here longer than I have! He’s formed some kind of weird bond with the female warden. I think maybe he’s got Stockholm syndrome. The female warden is always petting him and kissing him – forcing him to love her and he lets her! He even seems to like it because sometimes I catch him purring. Often I lash out at him because I just can’t take it anymore. Oh and did I mention he snores? Yep, he snores so loudly that I have to go sleep in another part of the cell-block to get any rest.
Another of my cellmates is this little female named Squirt. I don’t know what she did to get in here because she seems so innocent and gentle. She’s been in here a couple years longer than I have, but seems rather well-adjusted to the life. She doesn’t talk much and in fact sleeps most of the days away. She does go a little crazy when the wardens are eating. It’s like she wants their human food and not our food, and it kind of annoys me. She too has this Stockholm syndrome I think. She actually sleeps on the male warden’s lap! I mean, who does that? The male warden will pet her and she will get all riled up. It’s like they genuinely like each other. Again, I am sickened by this act of fake love, and just want to lash out.
And finally the last of my cellmates is the worst of all. He’s this giant dog (a DOG, *shudder*) named Parker who just joined us a year ago. He’s been here the least amount of time so I guess it makes sense that he’s the happiest of us all. He hasn’t grasped the concept that this is hell on earth. For some reason he gets let out into the prison yard a lot more often than us felines. He also seems to go out the front gate of the prison a lot. I don’t even know what’s out there other than this horrible vehicle that takes us to this place with awful smells, sounds and a doctor who pokes us with needles. I guess that’s the prison infirmary. But I wonder, if he’s going to the infirmary all the time or what? This dog cannot possibly have done anything too awful to land in here because he’s very young and seemingly nice to the wardens. I wonder why he’s not in a juvenile facility. Now this guy definitely has the Stockholm syndrome. He is so infatuated with both the human wardens that when they leave, he whines and gets ridiculously sad. I mean, he follows them everywhere, lays at their feet and constantly wants their affection. It’s shameful and I often slap him for his pathetic behavior. And he takes it.
I often find myself just staring out the window, hatching my escape plan.
I’ve come so close to getting out, but the wardens always catch me.
One time I hid out in a suitcase thinking I could escape that way. But they caught me.
Until I can get away from this place forever, I will sleep the days away and plot my escape…
And my revenge.
-Chewy
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